In the midst of some of the worst racial divisions the country has seen in years, the president and first lady decided it was a good time to tell People Magazine (America’s leading source for investigative journalism) about their own experiences with racial injustice. While observers might be justified in wondering how authentic these experiences are, coming as they do from one of the most powerful men on the planet, those concerns are surely put to rest by the depth and seriousness of the incidents.

Or not. Michelle insists that the protection they’ve experienced while in the White House was preceded by a period where “Barack Obama was a black man who had his share of troubles catching cabs.” She then launched into a “did that really happen?” story about her publicized trip to Target as first lady. Despite being surrounded by Secret Service and photographers, Michelle says “the only person who came up to me in the store was a woman who asked me to help her take something off a shelf. Because she didn’t see me as the first lady, she saw me as someone who could help her.”

The implicit racism in such an event – if it happened at all – is hard to find. Anyone clueless enough to A) not recognize Michelle Obama and B) be blind to the entourage surrounding her is not playing with a full deck. Either that or she was messing with the first lady deliberately, which would be hilarious.

Even allowing for the ultra-slim possibility that the incident played out like Michelle insists, how does that invoke racism? In her trip to Target, Michelle was dressed down but she wasn’t wearing a red shirt and a pair of khakis. It’s doubtful that the woman mistook her for an employee. So therefore, we’re left to assume that the first lady ascribes racism to anyone who asks her for assistance. If that’s the new definition of racism in 2014, then it’s no wonder the liberals are always up in arms about it. It literally is everywhere.

For his part, Barack said in the interview: “There’s no black male my age, who’s a professional, who hasn’t come out of a restaurant and is waiting for their car and somebody didn’t hand them their car keys.” He clarified that it had happened to him as well.

Time to pull out the good ol’ racism scale again. Let’s see. On one end of the scale we’ll put “Twice elected president of the United States.” On the other end of the scale we’ll put “Once mistaken for valet.” Hmm, interesting. Interesting. (Scribbles note on science-pad.)

Real racism, when heard or seen, should always be condemned. But when liberals looking to demonize white America insist that things today are only marginally better than they were in the early 1960s, they succeed only in sinking their own ship. The Obamas have every right to gossip about their “microaggressions” to the tabloids, but the truth is that things will never be perfect. Many white people have been mistaken for Target employees and car valets as well. Many more than have been, let’s say, elected to the highest office in the land.