Maybe the problem is that…people don’t have enough problems. We’re beginning to suspect that really is at the root of the cultural decay we’re seeing right now in America. Because in a country where there are real problems – starvation, mass homelessness, famine, plague, etc. – you don’t see this kind of thing. You don’t see people going out of their way to create drama out of thin air. They say that strength comes from adversity. Maybe the problem with the U.S. in 2017 is that many people simply don’t have enough adversity to overcome. We’re just staggering around in a state of numb boredom, looking around desperately for something – anything – that will make us feel halfway alive.
It’s a theory.
But there’s certainly something wrong, as demonstrated by the latest fake controversy – one that is once again aimed at a familiar target for American liberals: Ye Olde Hobby Lobby. This time, the retailer is in trouble not for their Christian beliefs or their stance on gay marriage, but for their racial insensitivity. Behold what Killeen, TX’s Daniell Rider had to say about a display of decorative cotton for sale in her local store:
“This decor is WRONG on SO many levels. There is nothing decorative about raw cotton. A commodity which was gained at the expense of African-American slaves,” she wrote. “A little sensitivity goes a long way. Please remove this decor.”
Now, we could excuse one moron for one moronic post; we couldn’t live our lives if we got up in arms about every stupid thing that people post on Facebook and Twitter. But this piece of nearly-poetic stupidity has been shared more than 15,000 times since it was first posted. And while we’re encouraged to report that the majority of people are treating it like the mental midgetry that it is, it has no small number of defenders.
“What do you expect from Hobby Lobby!!!?” asked one fool. “NEVER shop there!”
Yeah, stupid store with its stupid cotton – the material that makes up the lion’s share of our clothing and towels! What the hell were they thinking?
We’d like to imagine that even American liberals are smart enough not to fall for a war on cotton, but…it would be a false hope, wouldn’t it? These loons are out there cutting the heads off Christopher Columbus statues, kneeling for the national anthem, and calling justified police shootings “murder.” If there is a limit to their insanity, we haven’t seen it yet.
So yeah, we fully expect the Great Cotton Protests of 20XX to begin soon enough. Buckle up.