Professor Bryant Sculos of Florida International University recently published a fascinating piece of abject liberal nonsense in the academic journal, “Class, Race, and Corporate Power.” In case you don’t have a subscription to that particular journal, you may have missed out on Sculos’s powerfully stupid theories about the classic Disney film, Beauty and the Beast. In his essay, Sculos says the movie – both the original animated feature from 1991 and the more recent live-action remake – is a perfect illustration of something called “toxic masculine capitalism.”

Sculos says the movie “taught young boys that sometimes the sensitive, intellectual guy could win the heart of the beautiful woman (and that a woman who could and loved to read was worth desiring).”

Both the Beast and the primary villain, Gaston, are symbols of toxic masculinity, argues the professor.

“In the original animated film, we see a bit of the role that the villagers play in glorifying Gaston’s grotesque and necrophilic existence, but this socially-cultivated necro-narcissism and megalomania has more prominence in the recent version,” Sculos writes. “I blame the servants. I blame the villagers. I blame the Beast. I blame Le Fou. I blame Gaston. They are all responsible for the violent, close-minded toxic masculinity that nearly destroyed their small community.”

Is this dude serious? Apparently, because he actually stretches his argument out of the world of animation and into the real world when he compares the villains of Beauty and the Beast to a controversial Wall Street investor.

“In a similar sense, I blame the so-called ‘Pharma-bro’ Martin Shkreli for his decision to raise the price of life-sustaining HIV/AIDS medication by 5,000%,” Sculos writes. “I blame the CEO of the pharmaceutical company Mylan, Heather Bresch, for raising the price of the EpiPen by an extraordinary 400%. I blame our society for maintaining, reproducing, and too-often exacerbating the norms that condone and even incentivize these behaviors. I blame all of those who reacted strongly against these behaviors, but not against the fundamental premise of privatized health care: that any and all medical care should serve the goal of profit-making.

“Toxic masculinity merely reflects the toxicity of masculinity in general,” Sculos concludes. “It is a social virus, and it is highly contagious.”

Hey, we admittedly haven’t seen Beauty and the Beast in a few years, so who knows? Maybe the animators and writers at Disney did have some sort of anti-capitalism, pro-socialism, whacko liberal theory at the heart of their story. We kinda doubt it, but we’ve seen stranger things. We certainly don’t recall Gaston being into necrophilia, so we may be due for another watch after all. In any event, we’re probably not as “woke” as Professor Sculos, so we’ll leave it to him to tell us about the ills of American culture and how they can be solved with socialism, Bernie Sanders, universal healthcare, and a studious viewing of old Disney cartoons.

Everyone needs something to do, we suppose.